Mistakes

I don't understand myself
I think I need a cigarette
The sky is crying on my window pane
And I don't know where my family went

Through thick and thin
I thought that friends last forever
And love never ends when I was a kid
I thought that friends last forever
Don't know where everybody went

There's a stone in my chest where
My heart used to be
And I'm not tryna make no excuse
You make mistakes too, though
You make mistakes too

I don't understand the world
There, I said it, I'll say it again
But I don't trust anyone that's
On this damn earth
Oh, but I love in the best way I can

Through thick and thin
I thought that friends last forever
And love never ends when I was a kid
I thought that friends last forever
Don't know where everybody went

There's a stone in my chest where
My heart used to be
And I'm not tryna make no excuse
You make mistakes too, though
You make mistakes too

Golden plaques and panic attacks
I don't wanna cave under pressure again
There's glass on the floor and
My heart's in my hand
I could be anywhere in the world but
It feels like there's nowhere to go
Crowded rooms all alone
I'm in crowded rooms all alone

You make mistakes too, though
You make mistakes too
You make mistakes too, though
You make mistakes too

You know what? Fuck it
I thought that those friendships
And those relationships that I had
People that I called family
Were gonna be there forever
I thought that they would stick it
Out with me through the end
No matter what ups and downs I had
But the second that I made a mistake
The second there was trouble
They jump fuckin' ship
And that, I can't forgive
Maybe one day I can forgive it
But I can't forget
The worst part about it is they
Made this shit about themselves
Like, it had nothing to do with them
People call it a relapse, it wasn't a relapse
I set myself I set myself free
I just stopped living my
Life for other people
I know at the end of the day: I
Can rest my head on my pillow
Without any guilt, without any shame
Because I'm living my life for me
And not for them
I gave so fucking much to them
And then they gave me a
Goodbye when things got rough
I'm gonna be the best that I can be
Because I'm finally getting to do
What I wanna do
And by the way, I saved my own life