It’s a Barmcake

[Verse 1]
All across the country, we’re getting in a mess
There’s something that we need to sort, what is it, can you guess?
If you go down to the shops and a bread roll’s what you choose
Here’s a question for you, just what name do you use?

You shouldn’t call it a muffin
It isn’t a cob
If you think it’s a teacake
You should shut your gob

Because

[Chorus]
It's a barm cake, barm cake
A barm cake can't you see?
It's a barm cake, barm cake
Please name it properly
If you call it summat else
I'll 'ave to raise the alarm
'Cause you're saying it the wrong way
It's a barm, it's a barm

[Verse 2]
At the chippy you want something that's gonna hold your chips
But don’t let me hear the wrong words come out of your lips
Don’t be asking for a chip batch, don’t order a chip roll
You know what name you need to use, you don't need to be told

It’s not a breadcake or a stottie
Or a bara, that’s wrong
To clear the matter up
I want you singing along

[Chorus]
It's a barm cake, barm cake
A barm cake can't you see?
It's a barm cake, barm cake
Please name it properly
If you call it summat else
I'll 'ave to raise the alarm
'Cause you're saying it the wrong way
It's a barm, it's a barm

[Bridge]
We call it summat different all across the land
But I am right and you are wrong, why can’t you understand?

[Chorus]
It's a barm cake, barm cake
A barm cake can't you see?
It's a barm cake, barm cake
Please name it properly
If you call it summat else
I'll 'ave to raise the alarm
'Cause you're saying it the wrong way
It's a barm, it's a barm
Let me hear you sing along (hey)
It's a barm, it's a barm