Dear God

Hello uh, it's Ren
I don't really know how to
Start this letter fuck it

Is this life really what it seems
'Cause lately I've been in this
Place between awake and dreams
I know I only reach out to
You when I'm feeling blue
I promise I'm not using you
I'm just confused
I've got some questions I would
Like some answers to
Like is there meaning to this
State of short existence
My existential thoughts sure hope there are
'cause I'm resistant
To thinking that there won't be
Something better in the distance and God
Is there and afterlife where
Pain is non-existent
If you're up there God
Do you sit upon the throne
Or are you a humble soul
Wearing sandals and tattered clothes?
Do you mingle with the people like
An equal then on Sundays
Just kick back and chill and
Put your feet up?
Did I really choose this life
That I'm living now?
Will my sins be forgiven if I speak them out?
I won't lie to you, God
If there is a heaven
I really hope I get there 'cause
For real it sounds like heaven

Reading past the lines i just let go
Searching for prophets
My faith it is paper thin
So many questions in my mind
They replay like an echo
They never stop, my Messiah is porcelain

Dear God
Why do people kill each other in your name?
Is it really what you want or
Have we lost our way?
'Cause it seems like religion can
Cause division or people
Living in prisons of moral
Values they're given
What is right and what is wrong?
Am I a sinner if I don't comply with
Everything that Moses said or is that dumb?
And why do people disguise
Hatred in your name?
Homophobia, a history of violent
Wars and causing pain
High priests in their towers stacking riches
Women burnt at the stakes called witches
In the name of God, Allah, Zeus, Jesus
People claiming lives justified
By your allegiance
I think it's more complex
Than good versus evil
I think that there's both darkness
And light inside people
Through different eyes a man
Called a terrorist
Could be a freedom-fighter if he's fighting
For the side you're with

Reading past the lines i just let go
Searching for prophets
My faith it is paper thin
So many questions in my mind
They replay like an echo
They never stop, my Messiah is porcelain

So is it ignorant to claim that
We know what you want
And if I fast for the Sabbath
Is that what you want?
Or is tradition just superstition
Religion, a human vision just crafted
Out of people's ambition? Listen
I knew a girl that lost her
Baby before it was born
What's the purpose of that, God
What is it for? Why did my best friends die
Before I hit twenty-five?
Is it 'cause there's something
Better in the afterlife god
I've been feeling suicidal lately
Mental health is worsening
Feels like it might break me
If you're watching
You know that I've been strong but, God
How much longer do I have to hold on?
Please, just give me some solace
So that I know you've got my back
Please, just give me some relief
God, is that too much to ask?