Curse or a Blessing

Was this a curse or a blessing
Got my body numb when I seen the message
I been stressin
I was hopin one day you’d know my actions weren’t my intentions
Was this a curse or a blessing
Got my body numb when I seen the message
I been stressin
I was hopin one day you’d know my actions weren’t my intentions
See I tried my best for you
You taught me more than any school teachers lessons do
Big heart never thought any less of you
I screwed up I should have put you on my schedule
The worst feeling comes from realizing that your feelings were ahead of you
I really tried to better you, I guess you do a better you
I’m sorry if I’m upsetting you
This is what depression do
It’s hard to start from new but really who would’ve ever knew
I’d take the sun to give you light but you wanted the moon
Even in the darkest times you went and you grew
Never looked down on you we wanted a leveled view
An apology won’t fix what I put you through
But maybe if I make you smile just a little like your favourite colour blue
Or I could tell the story of how I met you
Or when I Pulled up at the port in my brothers Audi to get you
Just know that Ill never forget you
Was this a curse or a blessing
Got my body numb when I seen the message
I been stressin
I was hopin one day you’d know my actions weren’t my intentions
Was this a curse or a blessing
Got my body numb when I seen the message
I been stressin
I was hopin one day you’d know my actions weren’t my intentions
You independent and dependable
Calling you incredible would just be unacceptable
Your more than that
girl I’d put you on a pedestal
Know my hurting words never ever were intentional
I was in a dark place
I get alotta shit could be preventable
I should have been respectable
Choices were never sensible
I was high on your love girl you were my fentanyl
I know that I am nothing now
Easy forgettable
Never say my name around your friends
It’ll make you feel regretful
I been going through so much it’s just too stressful
See when you tell me things I’m just so forgetful
I knew that I loved you right from the get go
That’s what’s making it so hard just to let go
Made my heart heavy cause you were my medals
Want you by my side when I become successful
I’m in the car judgin life hittin the gavel
Was this a curse or a blessing
Got my body numb when I seen the message
I been stressin
I was hopin one day you’d know my actions weren’t my intentions
Was this a curse or a blessing
Got my body numb when I seen the message
I been stressin
I was hopin one day you’d know my actions weren’t my intentions