movies & music

I think I'm trapped inside a paradox
I couldn't feel myself while time stood still cuz that party sucked
As if I would know
Missed the invite cuz I was in my room
Crying at my reflection life flashed me by and it's gone so soon
My age is going up in fumes

Now im stuck listening to the songs that remind me of
All the times that I never had but it's nice to try and imagine
A different past
While I walk through some fields at the middle of the night
Haunted by the memories written in the sky
That were never mine
Just in the movies and music I play on repeat

Daydreaming cuz my social life was dead
About somebody else's arc in a story that I read
Hoping it were me instead
Dreaming of cities
Dancing in pairs is only for movies
Everyone else was in while I was the wheel in the background scene
Spring ends with no love story
If this were the movies

Now I'm frozen in time while the world around me moves
At a pace for the people that have never had to lose
The glory of being young
So I Iive out my teens in the middle of a bar
Possessed by my ghost yearning for another start
Just to see what it's like
To be in the movies and music I play on repeat

Movies and music I play on repeat
Movies and music I play on repeat
Movies and music I play on repeat
Movies and music I play on repeat

If I could romanticise
A history where I'm satisfied
Perhaps I could move on in life
And love myself before I die

Terrified of losing time
I'm 18 until I'm 29
Deferring all my golden years
Just before I disappear

Movies and music I play on repeat
Movies and music I play on repeat
Movies and music I play on repeat