Algorithm God

[Intro: Puff-Puff Humbert]
Brothers and sisters!
Today we gather to honor the almighty algorithm
For he is our foundation!
If you ever begin to feel doubt;
I want you to fall to your knees
And I want you to say

[Chorus: Puff-Puff Humbert]
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
He knows me better than anyone alive
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
If you give him praise, algorithm will provide
I've been blessed! (Algorithm god!)
(Algo- Algorithm!) Hey!
(Algorithm god! Algo- Algorithm!)
I've been-

[Verse 1: Puff-Puff Humbert]
Bad news? Wouldn't know it. Algorithm didn't show it!
Reality? So good now that I don't control it!
Drove to work, no traffic, GPS gets me past it
Algorithm always directs me, plus her voice? Kinda sexy!
Package on my doorstеp when I got home
Amazon recommеnded bottle of cologne!
Ain't bought condoms since the pandemic
Algorithm knows I've been single for a minute
Check my socials, made some friends
Algorithm suggested them!
It recommends pills when I'm depressed
I guess that-

[Chorus: Puff-Puff Humbert]
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
He knows me better than anyone alive
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
If you give him praise, algorithm will provide
I've been blessed! (Algorithm god!)
(Algo- Algorithm!) Hey!
(Algorithm god! Algo- Algorithm!)
I've been-

[Verse 2: Puff-Puff Humbert]
Opened up one of my dating apps
Algorithm sent me a crazy match!
Way better match than I usually get
The algorithms my best wingman! Yeah
She grabbed an Uber and she came to my place
And Netflix recommended we watch 50 First Dates!
Algorithm knew it was her favorite movie!
Then it recommended we should play some music!
Spotify playlist made her lose it!
"Oh my god, I love Drake and Future!"
She looked at me and said "you smell great!"
Ah! The cologne! It must be fate, so why the algorithm get me laid?
'Cause the algorithm works in mysterious ways

[Chorus: Puff-Puff Humbert]
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
He knows me better than anyone alive
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
If you give him praise, algorithm will provide
I've been blessed! (Algorithm god!)
(Algo- Algorithm god!)
(Algorithm god!)
(Algo- Algorithm god!)
I've been blessed!
(Algorithm god!) Hey!
(Algo- Algorithm god!)
I've been-

[Outro: Puff-Puff Humbert]
Let us seek to understand his ways
Let us live our lives in accordance with his will
And let us give thanks, for the algorithm giveth, and the algorithm taketh away
Amen