Lola’s Rock

Good afternoon
My name is professor Dimitri Lolilakoff
That's quite a mouthful isn't it?
Therefore, you may address me as Lola
I will not be offended
It's a childhood thing
Even my 6 year old calls me Lola and
I like it
Perhaps you heard about me
You see
I had an asteroid named after me
I spotted it back in 1992
Believe me when I tell you
You have nothing to fear
It is very far far away
Among friends we refer to it as lola's rock
I'm proud of it
Sadly, it's a different story
For my comrad alexia bravabich
He too spotted an asteroid for the first time a few months ago
And you may have seen it last night
When it came within a few hundred thousand miles of our planet
We like to make jokes about Abby's asteroid
But old Alexey laughs rarely and
For the last three days and nights
His right eye has been glued to the telescope
I try reasoning with him:
"Abby" I say
I'm aware of the odds against an asteroid colliding with the earth
He seems unconvinced

"Abby," i appeal
"perhaps you feel that your name will forever be associated with death, destruction, possibly the complete annihilation of our planet
However, should a collision actually occur, no one will be left to make the association"
He doesn't react

"Abby
At worst, you could face a few uncomfortable days leading up to the disaster
Go offline
Unplug the phone
Take a holiday
You deserve it."

"Now, of course, there is the admittedly remote possibility
That seconds before the collision
We will all be elevated to a far better place
An eternal plane of joyful delirium
Let's not call it heaven --
Let's call it Abby's domain"

My old friend doesn't even look at me
"Abby, Abby I know you're a pragmatist
I know you're unimpressed by all these projected scenarios
But consider this: your name would go up in lights!"
At last he turns towards me
Hesitates
And asks me for a chocolate
I'll give him the one I've been saving for last
You see that's what friends are for