The Old Alarm Clock
When first I came to London in the year of 39
The city looked so wonderful and the girls were so divine
But the coppers got suspicious and they soon gave me the knock
I was charged with being the owner of an old alarm clock
Well, next morning down by Marlborough Street I caused no little stir
The I.R.A were busy and a telephone did burr
Says the judge, "I'm going to charge you, with the possession of this machine
And I'm also going to charge you, with the wearing of the Green"
Now, says I to him, "Your honour, if you give me half a chance
I'll show you how me small machine can make the peelers dance
It ticks away politely till you get an awful shock
And it ticks away the gelignite of me old alarm clock"
Said the judge, "Now, listen here listen here, my man, and I'll tell you of a plan
For you and all your countrymen I do not give a damn
The only time you'll take is mine: ten years in Dartmoor dock
And you can count it by the ticking of your old alarm clock
Now, this lonely Dartmoor city would put many in the jigs
The cell, it isn't pretty and it isn't very big
Sure, I'd long ago have left the place if I had only got
Ah, me couple of sticks of gelignite and me old alarm clock