Lifeline

You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody
Turned the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing
What you supposed to do, when you're scared to let anyone get close to you
Afraid of the pain you put them through, that's all you knew

It was just a matter of time, every time, everything was fine
Inside looking for lifelines, instead of searching for minds that motivated the rhymes
It's not hard to find, when you have hope, when you don't you broke
Like a word unspoke, suppressing the cope, numbing with coke

Two packs of smokes, pretend you dope, like the fake smile you crack
When the pain's attached to your back, throwing hands at yourself attack
Looking for a breath you can't grasp, looking for a hand you can't grab
Looking for a mic you don't rap, and it's the only dream you ever had

And you wonder why you always sad, it wasn't your dad or your car crash
It wasn't the drugs or the too many thoughts you had, it was the wish you wanted so bad
You knew you were something, but you weren't doing nothing
Freestyles in the kitchen bluffing, only thing you were buzzing

Was the drinks in your cupping, now look at me rapping
Look at you clapping, I'm proud of myself, begging for help but I got well
You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody
Turned the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing

If you truly listen to this, you know I got as dark as it gets
Only reason I live, is because my faith held on to heaven's wish
I had to make a shift, chasing my gift, if not I was done
I was pulling the trigger, I wanted to live, but wanted death to come quicker

40 vikes and a bottle of liquor, why didn't he take me
I fell asleep a sinner, woke up a winner, threw my pills in the trash for dinner
Haven't took one since, never going back, I'm convinced
My happiness is the evidence, everything else seems irrelevant

I can't fail, I'm too intelligent, life is delicate, not definite
So if you need therapy, find a specialist, don't be afraid of your mentalness
Soldier your mind, a regiment, a true testament
When you stand up and speak, vulnerability doesn't make you weak

It makes you a man to me, I'm not fighting insecurities
To fuel masculinities, masking my identity, I put em at ease
Soldier, cause I am one, whatever comes I'm never done
I've been through fucking hell, most I put through myself, but I got well

You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody
Turned the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing
If this doesn't pick you up, I will
Drive to your house, the bridge, wherever it is

To make sure you're not just alive, you live, don't give in
Reach deep, find your words, speak, reach your hand
I'll meet, I'll hold you if you need it
Your heart, you can beat it, your mind, you can feed it

You are never defeated, keep breathing, keep seeking
Keep meeting, everything you're dreaming
We in this together, we teaming, I promise you I ain't ever leaving
This is the demon I'm releasing, I just started steaming

I can't help but start screaming, off the pain I'm weaning
I needed this shit, so if you don't understand it
Out my life, you live, I know my purpose
I'm meant to take sadness and fix, empathetic a kid

So when your pain hits, it puts me in the mix
Scars don't make you sick, unless you let it weigh on your conscience
Don't put your mind at risk, try to heal your inner critic
When you in too thick, if no one ever tells you, listen to this

You better than you admit, you better than you admit, you better than you admit
You were my lifeline, you were my home when I needed somebody
Turn the clouds into sunshine, and now I'm growing
Thanks for watching