What's Up, Duloc?

Performers
Welcome to Duloc,
such a perfect town.
Here we have some rules,
let us lay them down.
Don't make waves, stay in line,
and we'll get along fine.
Duloc is a perfect place.

Please keep off the grass
Shine your shoes, wipe your…face.
Duloc is, Duloc is, Duloc is a perfect place.

Performer
And here's the man who made it happen!
That towering colossus of moxie!
Looooooooord Farquaad!
(Lord Farquaad appears on a central balcony a la Evita. Turns around and feigns surprise.)

Farquaad
Oh, it's you! What a terrific surprise.
(sings)
Once upon a time
this place was infested.
Freaks on every corner-
I had them all arrested
Hey nonny-nonny-nonny-no

If you had a quirk, you didn't pass inspection.
We all have our standards,
but I will have perfection.
And sooooo…
And sooooo…
Things are looking up here in Duloc.

Performers
Just take a look!

Farquaad
The things I'm cooking up here in Duloc.

Performers
He likes to cook!

Farquaad
A model that amazes.
A plan with seven phases.

Performers
Bum-bum-bum-bum-bum

Farquaad
Things are looking up here in Duloc

Performers
They're looking up!

Farquaad
In Duloc!
The ladies all look swell.

Performers
Ahhhh…

Farquaad
The men are so dashing.

Performers
Ahhh…

Farquaad
Thanks to my new dress code, the fashion's never clasing.

Performers
The fashion's never clashing.

Farquaad
Hey nonny-nonny-nonny-no.
This castle I had built

Performers
Farquaad…Farquaad…Farquaad

Farquaad
is taller than the cliff-tops.

Performers
Farquaad…Farquaad…Farquaad

Farquaad
A city like a postcard-

Performers
Farquaad…Farquaad…Farquaad

Farquaad
A monorail and gift shops!
And so…

Performers
And so…

Farquaad
And so…

Performers
And so…

Farquaad
And so…
No one from the gutter in Duloc.

Performers
He's takin' aim!

Farquaad
Embrace the cookie cutter in Duloc.

Performers
We're all the same!

Farquaad
The upshot is enormous
when you can shout…

Performers
"Conform us!"

Farquaad
Yes! Things … are…

Performers
Things are looking up…

Farquaad
looking…

Performers
Things are looking up…

Farquaad
uuuuup…

Performers
Things are looking up…

Farquaad
Here in Duloc.
Hey, let's hear it for those Duloc dancers!
Aren't they terrific?!
(Big and ridiculous dance-break.)

Farquaad
There's no sign of slowing!
We're growing! We're growing!

Performers
Look, he's growing!
And growing!
And growing!
Look at him groooow!

Farquaad
Things! Are looking up here-

Performers
We practiced this part both forward and back.
We make one mistake, and we get the rack!

Farquaad
Things! I'm cooking up here-

Performers
He taught us to dance with razzamatazz!
He's trained in ballet, flamenco and jazz!

Farquaad
My hard work, and my rigor,
have made me so much bigger!
Things are looking uuuuup…

Performers
Things are looking uuuuup…

Farquaad
Things are looking uuuuup…
here in Duloc!

Performers
Ah-ah-ah-ah!

Farquaad
Here in Duloc!

Performers
Ah-ah-ah-ah!
Up…up…
Up…up…
Uuuuuuuuup!