YMT

Ever since the start of this pandemic I been stuck inside my own mental prison
Tryna find the right words to say to make em understand how I been livin
It's hard to chill when I been feelin like all my systems been in bad condition
Ambition is a muthafucka when the vision feels so damn distant
But I can't quit cause I'm superstitious like a black cat went and broke the mirror
Every time that clock ticks I feel the end start to draw nearer
I'm tryin hard to see the bigger picture, but reality is not gettin clearer
So I find myself drownin in the liquor tryna find a flicker up amongst the embers
I'm a victim of my own indecision, I'll be the first one to admit it
But I been grinding for a long minute, where's the plate I shoulda been given
I'm sick of waiting for denied permission so I guess I'll ask for my forgiveness
When St Peter judges my admission at the pearly gates or the house of sinners

You might think that you know me, but you don't know the whole story
There's a side of me that you don't see, better use caution when you proceed
I been feelin like a time bomb bout to explode in a crowded space
Been isolated for so long that I don't even recognize my face
I've walked so many roads, that I can't find my way home
I've heard so many stories, I don't trust what I been told
So don't judge a book unless you've seen what the page holds
Cause Lord knows that them pretty faces don't always have a heart of gold

I been thinkin bout goin off grid just to see how far I'd really get
I wonder who would even notice if I disappeared in total silence
Inside of my head is a ragin climate fulla weed smoke holding back the violence
Of an angry youth tryna find his timin and build a dream out the asylum
So lock me in that padded room with nothing but this microphone
I'll turn it to my vocal booth and then make myself feel right at home
I been reachin deep down in my soul for the energy I need to hold
Myself together in a time when I feel like the globe might implode
Don't tell me to just let it go when I know what's it like to be broke
And I'm falling back to my old habits like settin fire to my life rope
All I want is inner peace and the strength I need to walk this road
But I feel like Lieutenant Dan before he got up on that shrimp boat

You might think that you know me, but you don't know the whole story
There's a side of me that you don't see, better use caution when you proceed
I been feelin like a time bomb bout to explode in a crowded space
Been isolated for so long that I don't even recognize my face
I've walked so many roads, that I can't find my way home
I've heard so many stories, I don't trust what I been told
So don't judge a book unless you've seen what the page holds
Cause Lord knows that them pretty faces don't always have a heart of gold