Older Guy

I had a birthday, my oh my
I turned into an older guy
And older guy is what the girls will say
(When they) try to tell their mom and dad
That maybe it won't be so bad
At least he's got a job and isn't gray
Yet!
It's right around the corner
Yeah the time is sneaking up
It keeps on getting faster every year
But I'll be happy as can be
With pretty girls too young for me
They talk and talk, but I can barely hear

I have a girl of 25
She hasn't even been alive
As long as I've been playing this guitar
She treats me like her little boy
I must admit I do enjoy
Pretending that I'm younger than I are
And
She wants to start a family, but in a year or so
I may not have the strength to raise a kid
Cause if a child rides piggyback
I think that you would hear a crack
And see me break in two just like a twig

I had a birthday yesterday
It came and went and now today
It's time to get back to my normal life
Where I forget how old am I
And walk down to the junior high
To see if any girls will be my wife
No!
I don't think it will happen
And you probably think I'm wrong
For chasing younger girls in leather boots
But I am harmless as can be
I'll show you if you want to see
My gun will aim, but it no longer shoots