Help Inflicted

I couldn't see the reasoning
Existing is better than living
Sinking is better than swimming
Everyone around me
seems to have it together
dwelling on what I could've done better
a far cry from what I have in the present
to push the envelope and pen my own letter
The thought process is fucking flawed
Its two steps back to go one forward
If I'm a failure
my struggles are yours
Why haven't I felt this remorse before?
Repent for your sins
Brace for this storm and the ice-cold winds
I don't know where to begin
Why am I putting myself through this again
I couldn't see the reasoning
Existing is better than living
Sinking is better than swimming
Obsessed with my indecision
Keeping me bound to a makeshift prison
To separate the fact from the fiction
Please give me the life I envisioned
This attack on the system
Doesn't feel scripted
Doesn't feel finished
Like it hasn't been written,
This shit hinges on the outcome of a counter prescription
Is this what you want
To watch me scrap and claw
til' I don't feel
a thing anymore
Anymore
I couldn't see the reasoning
Existing is better than living
Sinking is better than swimming