pain's cycle of hatred

"You asked me why I'm doing all this
But even if I told you why
I doubt very strongly
That the knowledge would change
Anything at all"
I'm in love with the pain
Yes, I get lost in the game
I love it
I just keep changing my brain
Bag of bars on me
Don't touch
There weight on me don't look, (ah)
Hate on me that's crooked, (ah)
Everybody always gets hooked
I give everybody couple warning signs before they shook
But I can't cut you off 'cause
I can't be alone
But I need to (I need to, Ooh, Ooh, Ooh)
So I can heal
So I can feel, oh I can't feel
What is real? (What is real?)
"So for the love of the universe
Show me grace
And have patience towards my hellish traits
'Cause well I never asked to be me
And you never asked to be you so
Let's free ourselves and try to make do
With our blood bags, that we call hearts."