My New Philosophy

ANDREW LIPPA

Sally:
(spoken) Oh yeah? That's what YOU think!

Schroeder:
(spoken) What?

Sally:
(spoken) That's my new philosophy. "Oh yeah? That's what YOU think!"

Schroeder:
(spoken) Then why are you telling me?

Sally:
(spoken) What?

Schroeder:
(spoken) WHY are you telling me?

Sally:
(spoken) "WHY are you telling me?" I like it!
That's a good philosophy.
"WHY are you telling me?"
" WHY are you telling me?"
(sings)" Why are you telling me?"
My new philosophy
The teacher gave a D on last week's homework!
She said, "Miss Sally Brown,
Your grades are going down"
I could have told her...

Schroeder:
Your new philosophy?

Sally:
My new philosophy.
(spoken) Ms. be?
I'm she.
Look see
A D?
A D.
Well, why are you telling me?
(sung) And that's my new philosophy!

Schroeder:
That's your new philosophy?

Sally:
" Well why are you telling me?"
My new philosophy!

Schroeder:
(spoken) That's great, Sally. But I've got to practice Chopin's Nocturne in be-flat Minor.

Sally:
(spoken) No! I like it! "No!" That's my new philosophy.
" No! No! No!"

Schroeder:
(spoken) That's your new philosophy?

Sally:
(spoken) Yes! I mean "No!"
(singing) Just like a busy bee
Each new philosophy
Can fly from tree to tree
And keep me moving!
When life's a dizzy maze
On alterating days
I choose a different phrase!

Schroeder:
Your new philosophy?

Sally:
My new philosophy!

Schroeder:
Sally,
Some philosophies are simple:
"Man does not eat by bread alone."
Some philosophies are clear...

Sally:
" Leave your message at the sound of the tone."

Both:
Some philosophies pick and choose
Deciding what goes in it

Schroeder:
Some take a lifetime!

Sally:
Mine take a minute!

Schroeder:
(spoken) But Sally, anything that takes only a minute can't be very long lasting. For instance, Beethoven took over two years
To complete his brilliant Ninth Symphony...

Sally:
(spoken)" No!"

Schroeder:
(spoken)I can't stand it!

Sally:
(spoken) " I can't stand it!" I like it!
(sings) It's like a gurantee
Each new philosophy
And things are sure to be a whole lot brighter!
" Oh yeah? That's what you think!"
" Why are you telling me?"
" No!"
" I can't stand it!"
Now life is free and easy,
Much more philosophy-zy,
With my brand new...

(spoken)You know, someone had said that we should live every day as
If it were the last day of our life.

Lucy:
(spoken)This is it? Help me! Help me! I've got twenty four hours to live! AAAAAAAAAA!!!

Sally:
(spoken) Clearly, some philosophies aren't for all people...
(sung) And that's my new philosophy!

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