​panic attack (interlude)

[Interlude]
Stiles?
I'm fine. Yeah, aside from the not sleeping, the jumpiness, the constant, overwhelming, crushing fear that something terrible's about to happen
But it's not just a feeling, though. It's, it's like it's a panic attack. You know, like I can't even breathe
So if you're drowning, and you're trying to keep your mouth closed until that very last moment, what if you choose to not open your mouth? To not let the water in?
You do anyway. It's a reflex
But if you hold off until that reflex kicks in, you have more time, right?
Not much time
But more time to fight your way to the surface?
I guess
More time to be rescued?
More time to be in agonizing pain. I mean, did you forget about the part where you feel like your head's exploding?
If it's about survival, isn't a little agony worth it?
But what if it just gets worse? What if it's agony now and then - and it's just hell later on?
Then think about something Winston Churchill once said - "If you're going through hell, keep going."
It's a struggle
To try and breathe when you're drowning