Payback Is a Grandmother

Yo, I don't know what was on y'all niggas birds
To go up to the boat, and start robbing old folks
Now see you done messed with the wrong old lady
You done went wild, yo, check it

There was a Hardy Boy mystery I tried to solve again
Dude that broke in my crib, it wasn't involving him
Four in the morning, my phone ringing
I'm thinking, "Who the fuck is this," on the other line screaming
Told em, "Keep down," but they was breathing hard
It was my grandmother telling me that she had been robbed
I told her hold (hold) tight (tight), I'd be right over
Freezing but this situation made the night colder
Knew this was the night (that what?) that she played poker
With some friends in a club at the boat getting bub'
Said she seen these thugs on the boat for a while
Not gambling but every now and then they'd smile
Then blow! They had Mag's
And told everybody, "Put your shit in the bag"
Made people strip naked, quicker than a Luke record (what?)
Had the place took in a minute and some seconds
Asked her how many of it was em? (How many of it was em?)
Said she couldn't remember
She was spooked and buzzing, couldn't describe 'em
Cause it happened too fast (what?) said they looked like me
With they pants hanging off they ass
Got her some water, and begin to think
How these niggas take her wig, her bracelet and her mink?
Somebody round the crib know the deal
Whoever did it better have Blue Shield for real
Cause yo, it's the big payback

Later that day I went to the 'shop, to see what was up
Them niggas probably knew something plus I needed a cut
Walked in they was playing Jigga
Discussing how Da Brat titties done got bigger
These niggas next to me, was talking bout the heist
Whoever did it even got Jordan for his ice
Said that it was done so precise the cops ain't know nothing
Had to use all my might not to ask no questions
Put down the magazine, went to the pop machine
Noticing these cats, had the Bling Bling
They wouldn't be talking if they did it, it could be they team
A week ago neither one of these niggas had a ring
This Hype came in, selling CD's, said the BD's
Was bragging bout robbery they had done
By now, I'm thinking bout my gun if I see gramps bracelet
I'ma play racist (and what?) and make niggas run
It's the big payback

My imagination roamed as I got in the chair
Thinking when shit went down, I was I was there
Fucking with fam' who you are, I don't care
Have your guys pouring liquor witch'ya name in they swear
These chicks claim they was there, knew the niggas who done it
Said it was Smoke and them from the Wild 100's
Eight million stories got me running in place, it's getting tricky
(like who?) like dude, that do drum'n'bass
There was a air in the place, that made me suspicious
Normally, they'd be talkin like bitches
My barber cut me with a quickness (what?)
Asked him where he got the new bracelet
He said it was his sister's, I knew then
What made it official, he gave me my change
The money clip had gramp's initials (c'mon)
As I, whooped his ass up, six niggas masked up
Pulled up in a Cadillac truck

Three-alarm fire and a possible homicide
The building is entitled "The Ultimate Barbershop"
There are six unidentified bodies in the building
They are all presumed dead
I repeat they are all presumed dead
However there are no suspects
I repeat the subjects are at large
We might need some backup
Inform O'Malley that we need backup, over
The skit definitely needs more sound added to it
Plus a new writer for the script, thank you
Someone get Prince Paul on the phone please