What A Swell Party This Is

Have you heard, amoung this clan
I am called 'The forgotten man'?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Have you heard the story of
A boy, a girl , urequitted love?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

What frills, what frocks!
What furs, what rocks!
What gaiety!
It's all to exquis!
That French champagne!
So good for the brain!
That bands, it's the end!
Kindly don't fall down my friend.

Have you heard? Professor Munch
Ate his wife and divorced his lunch.
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Have you heard? The countess Krupp
Crossed the bridge when the bridge was up.
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Have you heard that Mimsie Starr
Just got pinched in the Astor bar?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Have you heard that Uncle Newt
Forgot to open his parachute?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

It's great, it's grand!
It's wonderland!
What soup, what fish!
That beef, what a dish!
That grouse, so rare!
That aged camembert!
That bab au rhum!
Will you please move over chum?

Have you heard that dear old Blanch
Got run down by an avalanche?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Have you heard? It's in the stars,
Next July we collide with Mars!
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

What a swellagent, elagent party this is!