What Was I Thinking?
[Spoken intro]
This is a brand new song, I've never performed it, this next one, so I don't know, it could be terrible, I'm not sure
But I'm just gonna try it out, OK? Here we go
[Verse 1]
It was a last-minute invitation
I did not have a thing to wear
I ran into the store, I said
"I need something black, something formal
Other than that, I don't care"
I made it to the theater as the lights dimmed
The first act was brilliantly fun
When I caught my reflection during intermission
I thought, "What have I done?"
[Chorus]
What was I thinking?
What was I blind?
When I bought this outfit
I must have been out of my mind
What was I thinking?
Look at this dress
I'm taking up drinking
My life is a mess
[Verse 2]
My good friend said "I know you're going to love him
I've known him for a long, long time
And if I wasn't happily married myself
In a heartbeat I would try to make him mine"
So I figure, I'll take my chances
I mean really, what harm could it do?
Makes you wonder about your good friends and their motivations
When something like this happens to you
[Chorus]
What was she thinking?
Who is this guy?
Maybe I will choke on this pork chop
And conveniently die
What was I thinking - I mean what was she thinking?
Quick, sharpen this knife
I'm taking up drinking
And I'm thinking of ending my life
[Bridge]
Ach du lieber
[?]
[?]
Que lastima!
[Spoken]
I just threw that in to try to make it like a world music song 'cause I hear that's gonna be the next big thing to take over the pop charts and I wanna be part of it
[Verse 3]
Oh it was late, I had insomnia
The TV stair stepper started to look good
I thought to myself, "Should I buy it?"
I heard Bruce Jenner's voice say "Yes, you should"
And that snackmaster and that bald-headed man spray
And that Victoria Jackson makeup kit
Now I can barely get around my apartment
It's so full of all this stupid stuff
[Chorus]
What was I thinking?
Look at this junk!
I can't blame this on drinking
I have never- hardly- I
Right now I'm not drunk!
What was I thinking?
When will this end?
What was I thinking?
When will this end?
What was I thinking?
This song has no end
What was I thinking?
OK, that's the end
