Soar & Cry

You just wanted the high
You just wanted the high, high
You just wanted the high
You just wanted the high, high

You said I’m too special to you
But made me feel like I’m an oddity that would never fit you
And then you said, you don’t know what to do
So we continued to screw
You said I’m pretty and cute
But yet I feel that I don’t ever suit
You well enough
You’re afraid and unaware of what you’re facing
You never thought you might
(What a fright)
And now you don’t think you’re able to
I was amazing
(Cause I loved you)

It felt like it’s some kinda plague
It was like a dream
But all of a sudden I knew I’m awakе
It hurts, it burns, and it turns me upside down
And then my hеart unfurls
As I cry with no sound
I still control my shakes
But every minute it takes
Is a torture to me
You talk but every time you speak
I gotta feeling you lie to me
So my heart gets bleak
Every time, every time

I’ve buried myself inside
And faced everything with eyes open wide
Yet it took too much to reach the balance
I tried
Though too fucked up with lies
Though conditioned to die
I got better in my head
And much more cynical in bed
I’ve lost all my beliefs and choked on all of my dreams
Cause in truth nothing is really what it seems
I belied myself so that I could hold on
Now take a one good look at what you’ve done to me!
Come on!

Now, I can fly cause I can see why
You made me feel this way
Now I can fly cause now I know why
You hurt me so much that I wanted to die
Now I can fly cause I can see why
I let myself get drawn into a lie
Now I can fly cause now I know why
I needed validation, your ego needed the high

Now, I can fly cause I can see why
You made me feel this way
Now I can fly cause now I know why
I’ve been in so much pain and wanted to die
Now I can fly cause I can see why
I let myself get hooked on a lie
Now I can fly cause now I know why
I gave you my heart but you just wanted the high

You just wanted the high
You just wanted the high, high

You never met anyone like me
That’s what you told me when love-bombing me extensively
You didn’t know what to expect
Oh, please! You knew what you’d get
If only you wanted to
Know the person you met
I thought, “God gave me you, god gave you me
But you’re a human so you can’t take it easily”
I was unsure but now I know what I’ve been
Just an exotic sex toy, a codependent plaything

Did you wanna take my life?
I just wanted to know what for did I strive
For you, for me, for us, for god’s sake?
You tasted and smelled like my destiny and it made my heart ache
You asked me why was I by your side
Why would I confide
I couldn’t explain
I guess, because it was so self-defeatingly alright
To pick a guy who couldn’t love me back
And acted like a self-centered child

You never believed me
So fucking scared to believe me
You were so insecure but couldn’t really leave me
It’s all because I was such an awesome supply
Took me forever to figure out why
I needed validation
You needed the high
On the altar of your ego I prostituted mine
I reveled in the darkness and self-destructive pain
Until I hit rock bottom and couldn’t do it again

You said I was too special to you
So I took it for love and didn’t know what to do
And then you made me soar and cry, and cry
The more we slept together the more I felt like I died
But now, you’re gone for good
And it’s been quite a while
So rest in peace, what had to happen happened
It was immature, infantile
We gave our demons power
Indulging one another